Watching Star Wars for the First Time: Episode VII

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The final installment of Leeann watches Star Wars is finally here!

Also, in case you missed my most recent Disney post, check out what happened during my first few days at Disney World over on my DCP tab.

In a stunning turn of events, I accidently turned on the option "English with descriptive audio" to have someone narrate what's happening. It's hilarious, so no matter.

Even the new movie starts exactly the same...

Luke has vanished! This is the best news yet. Now if only Han was missing too.

But Leia is a general! Yes yes!

Ship covers the moon, so it must be evil.

Storm troopers! Maybe they have skills now.

A robot not quite as cute as R2 appears.

Guy who looks like Obi Wan appears with random young guy who seems evil.

Stormtroopers, much better at shooting. Not a good thing.

I like how BB8 chirps instead of whistle whistle bleep bleeps

Why storm troopers, why? Why so evil? Why why why.

Convenient blood mark on important stormtrooper.

Kylo Ren, stop trying to be Darth Vader. You're not Darth Vader.

Guy I thought was evil is actually just stupid, like Luke.

BB8 moaned softly! Oh no oh no this is so sad!

Ah yes, he is an important storm trooper!! And I see why they've been unremarkable before.

The music is incredibly improved (along with, you know, every visual effect ever).

Rey frees BB8!! Rey is British??

BB8 is so happy to have made a friend. Lol this robot is hilarious.

I wish Kylo Ren sounded like Mufasa.

Another map of the evil ship! How nice! Throwback to Episode IV.

How is the force strong with Kylo Ren if Luke is missing?

Rey and BB8, best friends for life.

Wait, Rey, don't trade him don't don't!! He's your friend.

What, no, STRANGER DANGER POE STRANGER DANGER. I mean, I know Finn's good (now, I did think he was evil) but you don't.

Poe and Finn are clearly bros.

Questions you should have asked before running away with someone: names.

Wow Kylo Ren, I mean I hate you, but you know what you're doing.

Questions you should have asked before running away with someone: where they want to run away to and why.

They just blew that ship up because they could...

Leader Snoke? Who's he?

Also of the things to ditch in the new movie, PowerPoint transitions would have been at the top of my list.

BB8 with these zaps, I love it.

Sad BB8 is so depressing oh my gosh.

Poor BB8 everyone makes him save himself. Just like my dear (missing) R2.


Rey you are a flying genius!

Did they just leave Poe behind on the planet?

Kylo Ren control yourself! Destroying the ship never solved anything.

BB8's thumbs up is great.

Also, the fact Finn knows nothing tells me that stormtroopers are in fact worthless.

CHEWIEEE. You haven't aged a day.

Ew and Han.

Harrison Ford I'm sorry but you look really really...old.

Han what are you doing with your life. Are you really stealing again.

An Irishman appears. Why.

I predict Han and Co will escape on the Millilium Falcon.

How does Rey know how to do all this?

Oh look, they're escaping on the Falcon!

This is like the first movie redone with style.

Who is this Snoke? I'm confused.

Kylo Ren is Han's son, not surprised. I can see the resemblance.

Han is shocked that a woman like Rey could be cool and know more than him. Gag.

Oh Han. Still have to teach Rey because she's a girl.

What; where are we now? Am I missing a reference because I skipped 1,2,3?

Kylo Ren feels pulled to the light! But did he not know that at the last minute Darth Vader was good?

"Leia doesn't want to see me." Well I sure hope she doesn't.

Come on Finn, BB8's chirping anxiously!

But wait, Rey, no, it is your destiny, take the light saber.

Moody shot of Rey. Rey don't be like Luke don't do it.

Wait why the Nazi reference...

Oh my gosh they destroyed the city in the clouds... And four others...oh my gosh...

Oh no you're captured. If Rey was there that wouldn't have happened.

The fighter planes! People die in those.

Can we please acknowledge how Finn has no force?

Oh hey Poe's back! What happened with him?

I've decided Rey is Luke's daughter. Meaning, the cousins are fighting! Andddd now Kylo kidnapped her.

Finn's devotion to Rey is really touching.


If he comes back and R2 doesn't I'm done.

Aw sweet Chewie and Leia hug.

BB8 and Poe have the most adorable reunion!

Oh Leia, you've aged.

But I'm so glad she's mad at Han.


Kylo Ren sans mask is not threatening.

Oh but wow is he evil to Rey.

The force is with Rey, you can have nothing Kylo.

She will defeat you Kylo Ren!!

Hey, I know! Let's defeat the evil weapon in the same way we always have! Because why create your weapon in a different way?

No stop I'm never okay with Han and Leia together.

Finn, Rey is so far ahead of you you don't even know

A bunch of planes! They are bound to get shut down.

Han stop acting surprised when Rey does something

They named Kylo Ren "Ben" after Obi Wan. He's a shame to the name. YOU ARE NOT A KINDLY OLD MAN SIR.

I'm sorry I don't believe Kylo Ren is good.

I knew it.

Chewie, Chewie no. Those sounds. :(

My cat enters the room. "No no don't watch the movie watch how cute I'm being."


This destruction plan is so familiar...

Rey is doing the one thing Luke could never figure out! Focusing!

Oh sure what are the chances a huge hole went right between them...

And Chewie saves the day!!

The bombest women of all time hug. This is great.

R2 you're back!! You're back!! Just in time!

Oh Luke... Aged well you did not.

That's it! That's it?!?!

And now I have to actually wait...